Getting Healthy

There's been some very interesting conversations on a forum that I'm on, about eating healthier. This has always been a concern of mine, since many of my cooking habits, are just that, habits. I grew up as a meat and potato person, throw in a vegetable every once in a while and call it good enough. I'm not a big fan of cooking, so it was good enough. Or so I thought. For the past year or so, I've really struggled with my energy level. I mean, it has been soooo bad, that a lot of days I would have next to none energy and good days were more like a few hours at best, with energy. Multi vitamins for women over 50, helped out somewhat, but not enough. I haven't been truly enjoying my life, because I knew that what ever I chose to do, I had very little time in which to do things, before I'd crash. In crashing, I mean, I would literally get shaky and my mind would be so fried, I could barely think. So this recent discussion, has given me a direction.

Over the years, I've developed both some good habits (cutting back quite a bit on sugars and drinking more water than I used to) and some bad habits (beyond the not enough fruits and veggies, I was using way too much salt). I've never been a soda drinker, which from what I understand, is an issue many Americans tend to have). I do love to drink milk, so milk and water with 2 cups of coffee, tends to be what I drink during the day. I very very rarily, have things like chips in the house (really helps to not have little ones around for this one). So there were some good things that I was doing, but it was not enough.

So anyways, one of the first things I've done for my health, is start taking a product called LivaTone. It is in capsule form and you take one capsule, twice a day for the first week (I'm just finishing up the first week today) and then 2 capsules, twice a day from here on out. It's not a liver cleanse, but more of a liver tonic. Since our livers store so much toxic junk, I feel that this is a good place to start. Already I have noticed that my weight, which has fluctuated so wildly just during the day, is staying in one place. :-) And while my belly is not hugely going down, I have noticed that I no longer feel bloated and my belly does seem to be getting rid of some of the belly fat it's been storing. Like I said, this is just week one, so I'm happy that I'm seeing some result. Later on, down the line, I will do a full liver cleanse. But first I want to work on eating better, so I'm not just cleansing my liver, to only pour the same toxins back in.

Now while I have never had a problem with drinking water (I do buy filtrated bottled water), I did go ahead and buy this Fruit Infuser http://www.amazon.com/Prodyne-Infusion-93-Ounce-Natural-Pitcher. You fill the pitcher with pure water and fill the cylinder with what ever fruit that you like. And it naturally infuses the water to give it a nice fruity taste. So far we've tried strawberries, which were good, but took a few days to infuse with a stronger taste. Watermelon, probably would have tasted better had it been more fresh at the time. But by far, my favorite is using Raspberries... OMG... it's delicious and refreshing. I got this and many more wonderful ideas from http://www.theyummylife.com./

As for putting healthier foods into my diet... I've found another wonderful website, full of great and yummy looking healthy recipes http://www.closetcooking.com/ I haven't tried them yet... but I definitely will be as soon as I write up a grocery list.

These were things that I've found on my own. But the forum that I'm a part of, had a discussion about eating organic foods and why. I found it a fascinating discussion. Really, they didn't share anything I didn't necessarily know about, but instead they put it in such a way, that I understood the values much better, if that makes any sense. It did to me ;-)  We are fortunate, that we do have a food co-op here and it only cost $15 to get a huge laundry basket full of all sorts of fruits and veggies. Plus, they sell organic bread and tortillas (I love things made with tortillas). I did this a few times, but could never come up with enough recipes to ensure that I'd use up all of the fruits and veggies before they went bad. The bananas, were HUGE and absolutely better tasting than store bought. So I am looking forward to placing my order next Monday and getting started with eating much healthier.

Finding and affording organic dairy products and meats, will be a bit tougher. Right now, I do have a freezer full of meats, that I intend on using up first anyways. David has already said that he has lost much of his desire for meats, so in reality, I'd be buying more for myself. He wants to focus more on fish... which I do not eat at all. I told him that as long as he makes it himself, that's fine by me... I get way too nauseous with the smell of fish.

I'm glad to have David on board with changing up the foods that we're eating. He absolutely loves the fruity water I've been making and he is also taking the LivaTone. We are not going to totally jump in with both feet and ditch one eating life style for another, but what I've found in my life is that slow changes, tend to make me feel more at ease and encourages me to want to do more. I'm looking forward to sharing our experiences as we make dietary changes. More than that... I am looking forward to having more energy, so that I can truly enjoy my life. I have NO intention on growing older and wiling my time away on some rocking chair on the porch, unless it's to enjoy the ending of a good day. :-)

"Go To" Quilts

These are my "go to" quilts. I just love the simplicity of these quilts, as well as how quickly they go together.
This one is my Dragonfly Quilt. I keep finding myself drawn to the turquoise colors

This photo shows the detailing. I finally found someone who could do the dragonfly pattern that I so wanted for this quilt.

This is called the Jelly Roll Quilt and I just learned how to make this a few days ago. Believe it or not, I was able to complete this quilt in 3 hours, although some over achiever in class, did it in one hour LOL



I will be definitely be making more quilts, using these two patterns.

Tote Bags for Cancer Patients Begins...

This tote bag pictured here, while it was not the first
bag that I made for a friend of mine that has cancer, it
certainly was the start of me wanting to make these to give away to other cancer patients. I just love the whimsical and cheery pattern.

 The inside pockets are big enough to hold a couple of water bottles on one side and a Nook or Kindle on the other side.

 This purple print bag is the first of hopefully many, many bags, that will be given away.

What a blessing.... this my dear friends, is the response from some very lovely ladies, when I asked for fabric donations to make these tote bags. And there's still MORE to come!!!

Fantasy vs Reality

I hadn't realized this until now, but apparently I have been living in some dream world, as a way of coping with reality. Okay, before you think I'm totally off of my rocker, let me explain.

My husband took off a 4 day weekend. I thought this would be quite nice... 4 days to ourselves. :-) But the first 2 days, he spent more time on the computer or watching tv or playing video games. :-( I felt hurt and disappointed, but thankfully I have my quilting to keep me occupied. Anyways, I have no idea what prompted him to ask me, as I'm drinking my first cup of coffee no less, what I wanted to do today? Huh? Well, as I said, I was still on my first cup of coffee, trying to wake up. So I really had no idea. Secondly, I was a bit put out, that he waits two days, before he decides that we should do something together. He on the other hand, couldn't figure out why I was so put out. Sigh...In the course of our conversation, he had the realization that it was unfair of him, to "zone out" so much when he is home and then expect me to be all excited about him wanting to do something with me, every once in a great while. But I too, had a revelation.

Here he was, finally... asking to do something with me, and I had NO answer!! It got me to thinking of all of the times that I thought about day trips, or maybe going out to lunch, going on vacations, etc, but because this never happened, no matter how many times I told him what I'd like, these things were just dreams of mine. Just like the bridal shows that are on tv. Yes... I do watch them. I get to live out, something that I never experienced. That time of shopping for a bridal gown and planning a wedding. We won't go into that, but suffice to say, my wedding was not one of my dreams, nor was the dress that I wore. It's a dream world that I live in, one in which I get to live out, what is not true or has not been true in my life... as if I had. :-/  Today's discussion with my husband, got me to realize that I've shut down so many of my emotions and dream of what cannot be, as a way of surviving I guess. Sad, but true.

He asked me if my quilting and the tote bag project, was something I really wanted to do or was that too, a part of surviving an unhappy life. Actually, it is in part, both. I do enjoy my quilting. And I do want to make these tote bags. But I'll be honest, the tote bag idea, I never once considered that for real (again, only in my dreams and wishes) that most of the people that I've mentioned this to, would have responded in such a generous way. All of a sudden, this was a reality and people were taking me seriously!!! And now I too, have to take me seriously. Weird, huh? I've been so used to my little dream world where what I say, do and want, mean something to me and others and I'm not sure what to do, now that some of it at least, is a reality. It's just an odd concept to be taken seriously or like I truly exist.

Change is in the Air

How do I explain what it is that I feel? What is swirling around in my mind? For a while now, I've been feeling like I am on the edge of some kind of break through. Some who have known me for a while, might even feel that I've become more distant and perhaps I have been, as I sort out all that is going thru my mind.

For most of my life, I've been looking for "the place" where I fit in, where I belong. What I know for sure is, sometimes where we belong, is seasonal. Sometimes it's a forever place. Often times, it seems to be ever changing, the more we grow, the more we may find that we want different things from our lives. And sometimes it cements what we believe in and stand for. For myself, I feel like all of the walls and obstacles that have been in my way for most of my life, are falling away, leaving me with a clearer vision of what I want for my life.

I recently met a new friend, who has cancer. She's been battling it, in one form or another, for 5 yrs. I got a chance to meet her in person yesterday. We sat down and chatted for hours and I got to hear, how it feels for her, to live with it and try to fight it. I heard of the devastating toll it has taken on her and her partner. I heard of the life she once had and how cancer has stolen that from her. For reasons that I cannot explain, her story has touched me. Her partner of 23 yrs has been telling me bits and pieces of their story with cancer, while he was working on re doing our bathroom for us. It was because of the things that he shared, that I suddenly felt compelled to make tote bags to give to cancer patients. Anyways, that is a story for another time. Let's just say, that Kim's story, is part of the breakthrough.

Along side of that, are my kids. It's been over 4 yrs ago, since I've last heard from my beloved daughter Jen. I have no idea, where she is at, what she is doing or even if she is alive. That has done it's own damage to me. One that I've had to face and deal with. But recently, my youngest son, has also decided to cut out contact with the entire family and like his sister, no one knows why. Today is Father's Day... and no phone call from him, not to his brother, who recently became a father, nor to his own dad. And again, I find myself hurting and confused at his silence.

These are just two things out of many, that have come together and help me to get clearer about what I want for my own life. Some things, I cannot control anything more, than how I chose to handle it. Other things, have made me re consider, past friendships and who I really feel that I can continue on with, in the future. It's not to indicate that anyone is a bad person, per se... but rather, those that I have outgrown, because we're headed in entirely different directions.

Life is precious. Our time on earth is short. Some shorter than others. It is not a good idea for any one of us, to live our life, solely to please someone else and forsake ourselves. The best gift that we can give to anyone, is in being ourselves. Some will appreciate it, others won't. It pretty much helps you to weed, who should stay and who you need to let go of, because you're not doing either one of you a favor in the long run.

How this will all turn out, is any one's guess. But I know in my heart, that I need to continue to let go of what is holding me back, whether it be something that is too negative to be good for me or if it's something that I realize that our time has run out and it's time for me to move away and continue forward.

Relationships

I've recently had a series of instances that have happened, that got me to question the relationships that I have in general. It seems that I've acquired over the years, numerous relationships that are not healthy for me. What I know for sure is... I no longer want or need, relationships in which I walk away from being with someone and feel stupid or I feel upset. I don't want to feel like I need to be "fixed", when all I'm looking for is a safe place to fall or for support. I no longer want to hang around people, in which I feel the majority of the time spent with them, whether in person or on the phone, is all about them. I really do enjoy a two way conversation. Nor do I want to be in relationships in which I feel shut out, disrespected. I don't care if you agree with me, I just care that I can walk away from time spent with you, and still feel good about myself... and you.

A long time ago, I heard Dr Phil McGraw say, "we teach people how to treat us". And there's a lot of truth in that. I think that things in my past, had me believing that I just wasn't smart enough or good enough and that has led me to hold back in a conversation or to not stand up for myself... thru creating boundaries of what I was willing to accept and not accept. As we've all heard, we only get ONE life and it's up to us... to choose how we're going to live it. Well here I am, at 55 yrs of age and it's past time for me, to find the courage to hold my head up high and not allow the potential loss of a relationship, to dictate what I can and cannot say.

I have to choose to believe, that I AM a good person and deserving of being treated with respect. What I know for sure is... that there's a lot of relationships that I've held onto, because of how they once were, that are not fitting into who I am today. Some of them, I'm not ready to fully let go of. And those would be the ones, that I need to learn, for the time being, to hold at arms length, until I can accept that I have outgrown them. But I know that this recent incident with my own son, has really gotten me thinking of how I want to live the rest of my life, and it isn't in being a doormat, nor is it accepting disrespectful behavior.

Be Yourself

14 Rules for Being YOU
by Mark Hack

Be yourself.  Trying to be anyone else is a waste of the person you are.  Embrace that individual inside you that has ideas, strengths and beauty like no one else.  Be the person you know yourself to be – the best version of you – on your terms.  And above all, be true to YOU – if you cannot put your heart in it, take yourself out of it.
Starting today…

1. Get your priorities straight. – Twenty years from now it won’t really matter what shoes you wore today, how your hair looked, or what brand of jeans you bought.  What will matter is how you loved, what you learned and how you applied this knowledge.
2. Take full responsibility for your goals. – If you really want good things in your life to happen, you have to make them happen yourself.  You can’t sit around and hope that somebody else will help you; you have to make your own future and not think that your destiny is tied to the actions and choices of others.  Read Quitter.
3. Know your worth. – When someone treats you like you’re just one of many options, help them narrow their choice by removing yourself from the equation.  Sometimes you have to try not to care, no matter how much you do.  Because sometimes you can mean almost nothing to someone who means so much to you.  It’s not pride – it’s self-respect.  Don’t expect to see positive changes in your life if you surround yourself with negative people.  Don’t give part-time people a full-time position in your life.  Know your value and what you have to offer, and never settle for anything less than what you deserve.
4. Choose the right perspective. – Perspective is everything.  When faced with long check-out lines, traffic jams, or waiting an hour past your appointment time, you have two choices:  You can get frustrated and enraged, or you can view it as life’s way of giving you a guilt-free breather from rushing, and spend that time daydreaming, conversing, or watching the clouds.  The first choice will raise your blood pressure.  The second choice will raise your consciousness.
5. Don’t let your old problems punish your dreams.  – Learn to let go of things you can’t control.  The next time you’re tempted to rant about a situation that you think ended unfairly, remind yourself of this:  You’ll never kill off your anger by beating the story to death.  So close your mouth, unclench your fists, and redirect your thoughts.  When left untended, the anger will slowly wither, and you’ll be left to live in peace as you grow toward a better future.
6. Choose the things that truly matter. – Some things just don’t matter much – like the kind of car you drive.  How big of a deal is that in the grand scheme of life?  Not a big at all.  But lifting a person’s heart?  Now, that matters.  The whole problem with most people is, they KNOW what matters, but they don’t CHOOSE it.  They get distracted.  They don’t put first things first.  The hardest and smartest way to live is choosing what truly matters, and pursuing it passionately.  Read The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People.
7. Love YOU. – Let someone love you just the way you are – as flawed as you might be, as unattractive as you sometimes feel, and as unaccomplished as you think you are.  Yes, let someone love you despite all of this; and let that someone be YOU.
8. Accept your strengths and weaknesses. – Be confident being YOU.  We often waste too much time comparing ourselves to others, and wishing to be something we’re not.  Everybody has their own strengths and weaknesses, and it is only when we accept everything we are, and aren’t, that we are able to become who we are capable of being.
9. Stand up for YOU. – You were born to be real, not to be perfect.  You’re here to be YOU, not to be what someone else wants you to be.  Stand up for yourself, look them in the eye, and say, “Don’t judge me until you know me, don’t underestimate me until you challenge me, and don’t talk about me until you’ve talked to me.”
10. Learn from others, and move on when you must. – You can’t expect to change people.  Either you accept who they are, or you start living your life without them.  And just because something ends, doesn’t mean it never should have been.  You lived, you learned, you grew, and you moved on.  Some people come into your life as blessings; others come into your life as lessons.
11. Be honest in your relationships. – Don’t cheat!  If you’re not happy, be honest, and move on if you must.  When you’re truly in love, being faithful isn’t a sacrifice, it’s a joy.
12. Get comfortable with being uncomfortable. – Life as we know it can change in a blink of an eye.  Unlikely friendships can blossom, important careers can be tossed aside and a long lost hope can be rekindled.  It might feel a little uncomfortable at times, but know that life begins at the end of your comfort zone.  So if you’re feeling uncomfortable right now, know that the change taking place in your life is not an ending, but a new beginning.  Read The Power of Full Engagement.
13. Be who you were born to be. – Don’t get to the end of your life and find that you lived only the length of it; live the width of it as well.  When it comes to living as a passionate, inspired human being, the only challenge greater than learning to walk a mile in someone else’s shoes, is learning to walk a lifetime comfortably in your own.  Follow your heart, and take your brain with you.  When you are truly comfortable in your own skin, not everyone will like you, but you won’t care about it one bit.
14. Never give up on YOU. – This is your life; shape it, or someone else will.  Strength shows not only in the ability to hold on, but in the ability to start over when you must.  It is never too late to become what you might have been.  Keep learning, adapting, and growing.  You may not be there yet, but you are closer than you were yesterday.